One thing I don’t understand with men, especially with married men who works abroad and far away from their wives is that they cannot control their sexual urge. I only knew a very few who doesn’t go for escorts, adult services, adult personals or all this dating stuffs offline or online, but when I ask them do they love their wives and if so why do they do it, I always get the answer that they love their wives very much and it just happens and it’s just sex and it meant nothing. Maybe it meant nothing for them but it meant everything to their wives even if there’s no feelings involved.

“It is just sex and it means nothing” is a very lame excuse! There was this one I talked to about this stuff, I asked him what if it was his wife who did the same thing, wouldn’t it kill him? He said definitely it will and suddenly told me I made him feel bad but before that he was really defending that there’s nothing wrong with what he does because everyone does it. The hell with everyone, it doesn’t makes it right just because majority do it.  Besides the fact that they cheat their wives, they also risk themselves from getting sick.  Men are sometimes really stupid!

“How do you mend a broken heart? The answer is, you can’t. Cos every time you feel like everything’s fine and you can face the world again, life finds a way to break your heart again. But this time, the breaks are so deep, you can’t mend it anymore. And when you can’t mend it anymore, that’s the scariest thing.”

If I look back to my life last year, I couldn’t stop the tears from falling, I would always think why this had happened to me? What’s wrong with me? I totally messed up.

I’m trying to move forward, I am earning good money now, I can settle everything back in Manila and just start over with Maisie with me, surely it will not be easy, it’s not easy being away from her, but I will get there, and I hope sooner.

After everything that had happened in my life, I couldn’t seem to trust anyone, I always get so paranoid, and I always feel like guys are all the same, same stupid promises that they never seem to keep, same sweet talks to get themselves inside your pants, same bullshits.

A good friend told me, that if it hurts more, I should stay on it, face it and don’t run from it and you’ll get numb, until it doesn’t hurt anymore, crazy as it may seem, this too shall pass.

As much as I am still hurting, I am happy, meeting you was fate, the only man in my life now who believes in me so much, in so many ways, whose helping me better myself, who is always there, the best friend I can ever have, the man who accepts everything that I am, the one who says bluntly to my face all my faults, who showed me everything I need to learn about life, how can I push him away?  I always do and he always stays  I’m such a mess and he’s beautiful.

I was heartbroken and it was such a blessing,  I’ve grown so much stronger and met someone who really gives a shit, and even if I can’t really have him now and I know it’s not going to be easy, I’m keeping the faith that our time will come, so for now it’s more than enough that he is always around for me.

Lucky Me Pancit Canton with Fried Chicken Wings

This was my breakfast and lunch yesterday, I missed pancit canton, when I was in college, every time I go home and I don’t like the food that’s in the table I would cook me a pancit canton and have it with rice.  Chinese people here find it awkward that we pinoys eat noodle with rice, kanya kanyang trip yan!

Doritos and Cookies

This was my lunch the other day, I really need to learn how to cook more and eat real food.  My Team lead resigned and he told me he will remember me when he sees junk food because I always bring junk food in office and make everybody eat my junk food, hahaha, what to do? I can’t help it, I cannot live without junk food.  I remember someone told me he wonders how many Lays Potato chips stocks I have at home and always have one when I come to office.

If I were in manila I would always eat V-cut but  here you can only buy it from Lucky Plaza and it’s really expensive.

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One of the things I like here in Singapore is that you can see a lot of trees and even tough there are a lot of construction going on every year they still strive to keep the country green.

In Brazil, they have this project where they develop tree farms and forestry and anyone can join and invest, you can speak with Greenwood regarding the investment here and find more about the project information.  You can help make the world greener and at the same time earn money from it, isn’t a good deal?

Got this from a close college friend’s facebook.  Amazing how skinny I was with curly hair and how I can wear hanging blouse. If I remember it right, this was way back in 3rd Year College.  Life was simpler back then, I miss it.